The Evolving Orientation Letter

I hit the fifteen-year mark for teaching last year.  This still surprises me at times…it was not where I expected to end up…but after spending time with a few classes of students yesterday, it makes sense.  I’m much happier with the students than I am at my desk. Sometimes I just hang out in a classroom or lab to get a sensory reminder of why I work in nursing education. Watching students put concepts together and get excited with the prospect of learning something new is always exciting.

Teaching has its rewards and challenges. The challenges are typically brought on by a very small segment of the student population. Most of the students are dedicated, interactive and truly give me hope for the upcoming nursing generation!  Please keep this in mind as you read the remainder of this post.

The challenging segment of the population requires that you not only review the rules on a regular basis but continually clarify them. They have spent most of their life finding the loopholes to any barriers they’ve encountered.  Thus, the evolution of the Orientation letter comes to mind. Every year of teaching, it gets longer and more detailed.

Follow along for a look at what we felt the need to “highlight” as a school rule.

2002 – Here are the rules….please follow them

 

2005 – here are the rules….please follow them.  Let me highlight a few that have been problematic.

• You cannot wear undershirts with foul language. 
• You cannot make out with your wife on the couch of the clinical site.  You are asexual while in clinical.

 

2007 – here are the rules….please follow them.  Let me highlight a few that have been problematic.

• You cannot wear undershirts with foul language.  You do need to wear underwear under your white scrubs.  If you show up with underwear with smiley faces that can be viewed through your scrubs, you will be sent home to change.  You may not remove your underwear as an option.  There is no such thing as “commando” while in clinical.
• You cannot make out with your wife on the couch of the clinical site.  You are asexual while in clinical.

 

2010 –   here are the rules….please follow them.  Be aware of the following issues that can have a serious impact on your ability to complete nursing school at this college. 

• You cannot wear undershirts with foul language.  (You do need to wear underwear under your white scrubs.  If you show up with underwear with smiley faces that can be viewed through your scrubs, you will be sent home to change.  You may not remove your underwear as an option.  There is no such thing as “commando” while in clinical.) – Removed- Thankfully, we stopped using White Scrubs so I no longer had to police underclothing.
• Socks must be white. Shoes must be white. Checkerboard is not white. 
• You cannot make out with your wife on the couch of the clinical site.  You are asexual while in clinical.
• You may not smoke in the bathroom of the hospital or anywhere else in the hospital.  
• There is no drinking on campus…even in the bathrooms.

 

2012 – here are the rules….please follow them. Be aware of the following issues that can have a serious impact on your ability to complete nursing school at this college. 

• You cannot wear undershirts with foul language.
• Socks must be white. Shoes must be white. Checkerboard is not white.
• Hair must fall within a naturally occurring shade. Pink is not a naturally occurring shade of hair. Pink is not just a shade of red. Blue, green and purple are also not naturally occurring shades of hair. 
• You may not wear nail polish or gels on your nails – this includes clear. No one has bright blue nails naturally. If your nails are blue, you are cyanotic.  If you are cyanotic, you should not be in clinical. 
• You cannot make out with your wife on the couch of the clinical site.  You are asexual while in clinical.  This includes the parking lot.  There is no sex in the parking lot…particularly in front of the camera.  We are unsure of what turns students on while in a long-term care facility but are considering adding it to the “Sexual Disorders” lecture. 
• You may not smoke in the bathroom of the hospital or anywhere else in the hospital.  You may not show up to clinical impaired. You will be sent for an additional drug test. 
• There is no drinking on campus…even in the bathrooms. There is no smoking pot in the parking lot. Don’t do drugs…adopt it as a slogan. 
• Please do not invite your spouse to your clinical site. They may not sit outside in the rain and wait for you. The clinical site finds it “creepy”. We also find it creepy when they hang out here all day to wait for you. 
• You may not take pictures of your classmates and post them on Facebook without their knowledge.  You may not take pictures of anyone while using the bathroom. 

 

2015-  here are the rules….please follow them.  Here are some ways to get kicked out of nursing school. 

• You cannot wear undershirts with foul language.
• Socks must be white. Shoes must be white. Checkerboard is not white. Grey is also not white. 
• Hair must fall within a naturally occurring shade. Pink is not a naturally occurring shade of hair. Pink is not just a shade of red. Blue, green and purple are also not naturally occurring shades of hair.
• You may not wear nail polish or gels on your nails – this includes clear. No one has bright blue nails naturally. If your nails are blue, you are cyanotic.  If you are cyanotic, you should not be in clinical.  You should know what cyanotic means by now. 
• You cannot make out with your wife on the couch of the clinical site.  You are asexual while in clinical.  This includes the parking lot.  There is no sex in the parking lot…particularly in front of the camera.  We will discuss this more in the Sexual Dysfunction lecture. 
• You may not smoke in the bathroom of the hospital.  Please adhere to all non-smoking signs. You may not show up to clinical impaired. You will be sent for an additional drug test.
• There is no drinking on campus…even in the bathrooms. There is no smoking pot in the parking lot. Don’t do drugs…adopt it as a slogan.
• Please do not invite your spouse to your clinical site. They may not sit outside in the rain and wait for you. The clinical site finds it “creepy”. We also find it creepy when they hang out here all day to wait for you. This includes your mother.
• You may not take pictures of your classmates and post them on Facebook without their knowledge.  You may not take pictures of anyone while using the bathroom. You should not be disrobing anywhere on campus and be asking people to take pictures of you.  “Fun” pictures in the lab of you in the mannequins wigs pretending to be in clinical are also not allowed. 

 

2018 –here are the rules….please follow them.  We are expecting that if we discuss the issues below, we will not be faced with them in clinical.  Please ask any questions to clarify at orientation. Not clarifying the rules is not a “pass” to breaking them. 

• You cannot wear undershirts with foul language. If your shirt falls open when you bend over, please do wear an undershirt. 
• Socks must be white. Shoes must be white. Checkerboard is not white. Grey is also not white.
• Hair must fall within a naturally occurring shade. Pink is not a naturally occurring shade of hair. Pink is not just a shade of red. Blue, green and purple are also not naturally occurring shades of hair. Unicorn is also not a naturally occurring shade. 
• You may not wear nail polish or gels on your nails – this includes clear. No one has bright blue nails naturally. If your nails are blue, you are cyanotic.  If you are cyanotic, you should not be in clinical.  You should know what cyanotic means by now.
• You cannot make out with your wife on the couch of the clinical site.  You are asexual while in clinical.  This includes the parking lot.  There is no sex in the parking lot…particularly in front of the camera.  We will discuss this more in the Sexual Dysfunction lecture.
• You may not smoke in the bathroom of the hospital.  Please adhere to all non-smoking signs. You may not show up to clinical impaired. You will be sent for an additional drug test. While marijuana is legal in California, it is still not legal to smoke it prior to patient care. Yes…we are sure. 
• There is no drinking on campus…even in the bathrooms. There is no smoking pot in the parking lot. Don’t do drugs…adopt it as a slogan. No…we still don’t want you smoking pot before clinical. 
• Be on time for all classes and clinical. Walking in fifteen minutes late with a Starbucks in hand will get you sent home.
• Please do not invite your spouse to your clinical site. They may not sit outside in the rain and wait for you. The clinical site finds it “creepy”. We also find it creepy when they hang out here all day to wait for you. This includes your mother.
• You may not take pictures of your classmates and post them on Facebook without their knowledge.  You may not take pictures of anyone while using the bathroom. You should not be disrobing anywhere on campus and be asking people to take pictures of you.  “Fun” pictures in the lab of you in the mannequins wigs pretending to be in clinical are also not allowed.
• I would prefer to not get involved in your social media but will have to if it becomes a distraction in class. It is not a weapon – please use all forms of social media – Instagram, Facebook. Twitter, Snapchat, etc. for a social outlet and not to berate your teachers or fellow students. Remember, you are in school to become a nurse. This means that you must actually care about people. 

 

Again, please keep in mind that the “clarification” of the rules is needed by a small population of the student body. I truly enjoy the students and am impacted daily on how hard most of them work. I’ve seen students that are working full time, coming to school full time and caring for their children in the midst of their insane schedule. They are the rule. The exception? They typically burn out or are kicked out long before the program is over. Not before they give me some crazy moments and more info for the orientation letter, however!

What has changed in your job in the last fifteen years?